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The Art of Walking Away:A Biblical Guide To Conflict Resolution

May 19, 2024—Verbal debates with friends, colleagues, classmates, neighbors, family, and strangers arise during several instances in our lives. Some discourses lead to physical altercations when pride overcomes the person. For Christians, conflicts will arise from all sides—family, friends, coworkers/classmates. Jesus Himself said we would have trials, tribulation, and persecution.

However, this does not mean we seek such events, nor do we allow our pride to overtake what the Holy Spirit is trying to accomplish. So, what happens when you are in a verbal argument and the dialogue escalates? Of such men and matters, Jesus tells us to walk away.


Navigating Conflict with Wisdom and Grace

When Jesus sent His disciples in pairs, He instructed them, “And whoever will not receive you nor hear your words, when you depart from that house or city, shake off the dust from your feet.”(Matthew 10:14). In the next verse, Jesus said, “Assuredly, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for the land of Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment than for that city.” (Matthew 10:15).


Certain fights and arguments are not worth staying into. The beginning stages of the argument may be worthwhile for the kingdom of heaven because it produces spiritual seeds from you as the sower to the next, who will be the reaper. If someone keeps on arguing with you, it is not worth your time or energy to sustain the argument, for judgment will come to every person living or dead. God will revisit them one way or another—either in this carnal life, or the next.  


Bible, clasped hands
Photo credit: Wix Media

Now, there will be times when your argument is among church members. Matthew 18:15-17 clearly states when a brother sins, confront them one-on-one. If they receive your words, great! If not, return with a second brother or sister in Christ who knows the Holy Bible. This edifies them through the law in Deuteronomy 19:15:

One witness shall not rise against a man concerning any iniquity or any sin that he commits; by the mouth of two or three witnesses the matter shall be established.

 When they do not listen to the two brothers, then what? Bring it to the church.

Prioritizing Peace over Conflict

When a church member refuses to listen to you, and you and your brother, the last step is to bring it to the church. This does not mean that you come slamming doors and talk about the matter during a service. Rather, bring it to the pastor of the church. If he is not available, wait. If the matter cannot wait, bring it to the church elders.


If they refuse to listen to the words of the church, Jesus said, “And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.”(Matthew 18:17). What does this mean? Avoid them — for their works justify their beliefs. They may claim to know God, but their actions in their daily lives, both inside and outside the church, show otherwise (Titus 1:16).

There are people in the church who are truly there for God, but others want to bring the church down. Instead of spending time in the Holy Bible, the latter group focuses on other things—never strengthening their communion with the Holy Spirit, their worship of Jesus Christ, or their relationship with God. Again, avoid them, and do not let your family spend time with them.



Conflicts are inevitable, but as Christians, we are called to approach them with wisdom and humility, dedicating our lives to God. By following the teachings of Jesus Christ and adhering to biblical principles, we can foster healthier relationships, promote understanding, and contribute to a more harmonious church. Remember, every argument has a stopping point; when you reach that point, it's best to walk away.


Accepting Jesus

Are you ready to accept Jesus Christ into your life today? If so, pray this prayer:

God, I confess that Jesus came in the flesh and blood, paid the price for my sins, died on the cross, rose on the third day, ascended to the heavens, and sent the Holy Spirit to help me understand Your ways. For that, I accept Jesus Christ as my savior and Lord, and I welcome the Holy Spirit in my life. In Jesus’s name I pray, amen!


Welcome to the Christian family!

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